My Story: From Winning Arguments to Transforming Hearts

I used to think communication was to show off what I knew and to convince others. 

My UCLA law degree taught me to argue, persuade, and win. For years, I believed the person who spoke most convincingly would come out on top. It wasn't play to win, it was say to win.

Everything changed when I learned the counterintuitive truth: Listening is the true powerhouse in effective communication.  Research studies consistently demonstrate that your odds of being heard skyrocket when you become the person who truly listens. 

Not the everyday "waiting to talk" that passes as listening. Not nodding while planning your response. I'm talking about a revolutionary form of listening that transforms relationships in real time.

The 30-Year Journey

I spent a career studying, practicing, and honing this form of listening that has the power to transform relationships. Seven years of intensive communication training. Four years researching compassion and mindfulness. Twenty-three years as a Designated Master Teacher in Long Beach schools, where I watched this skill change everything—from parent conferences that had been going nowhere to student breakthroughs that seemed impossible.

But the real proof came through my podcast.

The Webby-Honored Discovery

When I started interviewing guests, something unexpected happened. People began sharing parts of their lives they'd never revealed publicly. Conversations that were supposed to last 30 minutes stretched to two hours because guests didn't want to stop talking.

The secret wasn't my questions—it was how I listened to their answers.

This deep listening approach led my podcast to top rankings and a Webby Honor. But more importantly, it confirmed what I'd been discovering for decades: **Transformative Listening doesn't just help you hear others better—it makes others feel heard in a way that creates instant, authentic connection.**

The Irony

Everyone wants to be heard. Yet most of us never learned how to listen in a way that actually makes others feel heard. Your body knows you're distracted before your mind does. Your brain misses 60-80% of what people actually say because it's planning responses while they speak.

I spent thirty years unlearning what law school taught me—moving from speaking to win to listening to heal. From proving points to building bridges.

Why This Matters for You

The techniques I've perfected don't just improve your relationships—they transform them. When you master Transformative Listening, you become the person others seek out when they need to be truly heard. Your family conversations deepen. Your professional relationships strengthen. Your ability to connect authentically becomes your superpower.

This isn't theory. This is three decades of research, practice, and real-world results distilled into techniques that work in your very next conversation.

The culmination of this journey is my 21-Day Transformative Listening Course and personalized coaching—where I share everything I've learned about turning everyday exchanges into opportunities for genuine human connection.

Because in a world full of people talking, the person who truly listens becomes the person who is truly heard.