Week One - Noticing
Today's Practice
During your next conversation, discretely note the time and commit to five minutes of "thought watch." Each time your mind wanders from the speaker's words—whether to your response, your to-do list, or that thing that happened yesterday—make a mental checkmark.
Don't judge these moments or try to stop them. Simply notice and count. At the end of the five minutes, note:
How many times your mind wandered
What types of thoughts pulled you away (planning responses, personal memories, judgments, distractions, etc.)
Which moments in the conversation triggered the most wandering
The Science Behind This Practice
Studies by researchers Baer and Schooler reveal that simply noticing when your mind wanders can reduce wandering thoughts by nearly 50%! This isn't magic—it's neuroscience.
Think of it like this: you can't fix a leaky faucet without first knowing where the water's coming from. Your wandering mind has predictable "leak points" during conversations, and this exercise helps you identify your personal patterns.
The act of catching yourself—even without trying to change anything yet—actually strengthens your brain's attention management system. It's like discovering you have a muscle you didn't know existed, then giving it its first workout.
Reflection Questions
What surprised you about your mind's wandering patterns?
How did simply observing your thoughts change the quality of your listening?
